1. When someone says they don’t want to be in a relationship, believe them. If someone insinuates anything along the lines of not being able or ready to date, or that they can’t date “someone” because of X, Y, and/or Z reasons – all things you check the box for – they are most likely politely telling you they can’t date you. Alternatives: “I’m not interested in anything serious right now, ” “I am not emotionally available,” etc.
2. Just because you’re not playing games, it doesn’t mean other people aren’t. When it comes to dating, the best of us practice the golden rule: treat people how you want to be treated. But we have to accept that practicing the golden rule on others, does not mean receiving the same courtesy. Some people ghost, some people toy with your feelings, some people keep you in an emotional purgatory, and the list goes on and on. Such is life. You have to hold onto your principles even when they don’t get you the same treatment in return.
3. Timing can be a cop-out, but it can also be a very real restraint. A friend once said something about timing that gave me pause: timing is more important than whether you and your love interest like each other. Yikes. The thought of that is really disheartening. The truth is timing does matter, but so does trying despite timing. You must be willing to acknowledge what kind of timing issue you face.
4. The sooner you can accept how you feel about someone, the sooner you’ll know what to do about it. You can dance around your feelings all you want, but sooner or later, it catches up with you. You can also rationalize, argue, and try to talk yourself out of how you feel, but all of that is mostly futile. Feelings can be a fleeting thing, and I certainly don’t think they should always be acted upon. But being honest with yourself comes first, the rightness or wrongness, or action or inaction, comes second.
5. You will always love or really, really like some people, even if they don’t “deserve” it. Is there anything worse than falling for a person who is terrible (for you)? Whether love is a choice or not, is a question we will never be able to answer for certain. What is a choice however, is who you choose to be with, assuming of course they also choose you. Whether they are ones who got away, or lifetime crushes, or shoulda-coulda-wouldas, a little part of us will always carry some people with us. Is that weird or is it just human?
التصنيف:
sexy love